Saturday, November 12, 2011

Walking through trials

Where have the past few months gone?!?! Since August we have:

~moved out of our house
~refinished the hardwood floors in grandparents house
~moved into grandparents house
~started homeschooling again
~Sawyer broke his arm and we have made multiple trips to a specialist weekly for the past couple of months
~I went on a Walk to Emmaus
~we are preparing the walls to prime and paint

That is it in a nutshell. We are busy, but we have peace in our new temporary home until the Lord shows us where to go. About a month ago I was crying out to God about how hard this year has been (it has been the hardest year in my adult life) and I felt like the Holy Spirit said, "Stop saying that." Proverbs 18:21 came to mind, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life]." I yelled in my car (I don't normally do this and if you knew me in real life you would crack up because I am a generally quiet person), "THE REST OF 2011 IS A GOOD YEAR!" I really felt like something broke off of me at that point. A weight had been lifted and I have had so much peace. There is power in our words. Our words can change things for bad or good. The boys are SO HAPPY homeschooling and the rest of our year is great. Instead of me thinking, "what in the world is going to happen next?" I am excited for the holidays.

I haven't shared publicly some of the major trials our family has been through this year, but I will update where He has us now.

You know that there are so many times in our life that we want to go from A to Z but skip all of the letters in between and I have just been thanking the Lord for the process because if I had just skipped to Z, I don't think I could have handled it. God knows what He is doing. Every situation is a growing situation. I recently learned that being perfect is not what we have made it to be. In Hebrew being perfect means to grow in maturity daily in the Lord. That really set me free from me trying to "be perfect". The perfect mom, the perfect wife, who could do no wrong, etc. But I can be perfect in the Hebrew definition. Praise the Lord!

When I look back 8 months ago I didn't know how we were going to survive this trial. Thank you Lord for the process. I have a deeper and different trust than I had before in the Lord. I am not afraid for bad things to happen. I know that our children have watched us through this and they have seen me cry more than ever, but they have also seen me relax and not be so paranoid about things which has given them an opportunity to grow into the mighty men of God they are becoming. I am learning to not have worst fears.

Something that brought healing to my husband and I was going on a "Walk to Emmaus". It is a worldwide ministry. You need to sponsored by someone who has already gone on a "walk". We have always heard it is best if the husband goes first and then the wife, and after going I agree with that. You don't really know what is going to happen. It is like a Christmas present that everyone knows that you are getting except you. You don't have a cell phone or a watch and it lasts for three days. I have known a lot of people who have gone through the years since we have one so close to our town, and I have heard the same thing over and over....God meets YOU exactly where YOU are at spiritually, emotionally, etc. There is no agenda. There is so much prayer that surrounds this. People are praying long before you even know you are going. When you go it is your divine appointment. It is really amazing. Each of us going brought so much healing to our family and to ourselves.

I am hoping to be able to write more frequently now that we are getting more settled.

1 comment:

  1. I am happy to read this update. I just recently posted about some ups and downs we have been going through, but, like you, I see God's hand guiding us along. I look forward to reading more from you in the future.